It's began when I was going to my bands base camp for getting exercise. But in the middle of my trip, I got a motorcycle accident because I tried to break through the traffic sign. It makes me very shocked and scared because my motorcycle was broken and my mobile phone was lost. At that time, all the people who helped me directly call my father in order to bring me back to home. This incident had given me a most memorable bad experience in my life, because after that I can't walk normally in one week. But I can still do all my work and don't give up for getting exercise in my bands.
Topic sentence : I got a motorcycle accident because I tried to break through the traffic sign
Topik : I got a motorcycle accident
Controlling idea : I tried to break through the traffic sign
Topic sentence : I got a motorcycle accident because I tried to break through the traffic sign
Topik : I got a motorcycle accident
Controlling idea : I tried to break through the traffic sign
Hi Aldi
BalasHapusI wanna ask you. What does your story talk about? Accident, right? it would be more interesting if you explain why you got an accident. Please remember if you write something, always put 5W 1H in your mind. It'll help you to make writing easier.
Ok thanks a lot for your comment, it can be a good suggestion for me.
BalasHapusYep do agree with Sigit. I also still use the classical method using WH-q be4 writing. Aldi, since ur TS is about the motorcycle accident, u hev to write the process clearly to make readers easily hev the same concept on why it happened (a u sleepy or tired riding ur bike), where exactly it happened, what happened 2 u right after the accident. Say something more about those things. Please be aware of the consistency of using grammar and the choice of words. Using the transition signal is also much better to do in order to hev better developed paragraph. Keep in the right track, Aldi! Em waiting 4 ur better and better paragraph!
BalasHapus